Out of touch out of time

??? ? ??????? ???? | ???????? ???????

✎… zenitsu did have nightmares on a regular basis, but never did anyone help him through them before. luckily he had you this time and you were happy to comfort him.

???????: agatsuma zenitsu x gn!reader

?.?: 2.014

???????: mention of nightmares

?.?: i’m so happy i was able to finish this!!! i haven’t written a oneshot in so long ?? i’m still working on the requests don’t worry, but i’m also wroking on oneshots again!! ?

??? ???? ?????? ?? ??? ????? ?? ????????. Soft and quiet but still clearly audible in the otherwise silent room. You blinked into the darkness, confused at first. Sorting the sound took you longer than you’d liked to admit. But you blamed it on the warmth surrounding you, your sheets wrapped around you not allowing any of the cold night air to seep through your skin and to your bones. It didn’t help clear your groggy mind.

The whimpers had gotten louder, whinier, and were now mixed with incoherent mumbling. Your rational mind started working again. You shot up in alarm, turning your head around to look for the source and your eyes landed on a ball of bundled up in blankets, something beneath moving under the mass of the sheets.

“Zenitsu!” You whispered harshly, kicking at your blanket to free yourself from the mess and cursing when your foot got stuck before you managed to get free and fight yourself to your feet.

Rushing across the room you dropped down on your knees beside the mountain of blankets, hand reaching out to pull them aside. A blond chock of hair was revealed and then Zenitsu’s face came into sight.

Your eyes widened and your grip tightened around the fabric of the blanket as you eyed him. Zenitsu’s face was contorted into fear and pain, his eyes shut tightly. His bangs stuck to his sweaty forehead and tears were running down his cheeks. Not only that, his whimpers had gotten more and more intense until they turned into sobs.

Your heart broke at the sight and you reached out for him, hesitant because you weren’t supposed to wake someone from a nightmare right? But then a heart-wrenching sob filled the room and Zenitsu was mumbling something that you couldn’t decipher, swallowed by the noise. He was turning around, his face scrunching up as more tears escaped his eyes.

“Zenitsu!” You called again, this time louder but still in a whisper tone and you shook his shoulder gently. “Please, Zenitsu. Wake up. It’s just a dream. You’re safe! Zenitsu, please!”

Zenitsu’s body froze before he gasped and shot up. His eyes, now wide and fearful, darted around the room before they landed on your small form kneeling in front of him. The boy blinked, tears slipping out his eyes still and he relaxed when he noticed it was just you. Not a demon or whatever had haunted him in his dream, but just you.

“Y/n?” he asked, voice soft and brittle and you felt your heart break a little at how scared he sounded.

Of course, Zenitsu being scared wasn’t new to you or any of your friends, but this felt different. He wasn’t screaming and thrashing around at the sight of a demon or dramatically going on about his early death. He was sitting in front of you, sleep in his eyes and face open and vulnerable. And he was shaking so horribly beneath the blankets.

“Yeah, sorry, you had a bad dream.”

Zenitsu nodded and you noticed how ragged his breath sounded when he raised his hand to wipe his snotty nose on his sleeve. His hand was shaking, too.

“Did I wake you up?“ He asked softly and averted his eyes, looking down at his blankets.

“It’s not important, Zenitsu. Do you need something?”

The boy shook his head, still not looking at you and you couldn’t tell whether it was because he was feeling guilty or because he was embarrassed. Thinking back on the multiple times he had gripped your hand and tried to drag you away from demons because it was too dangerous you’d be surprised.

He didn’t answer your question. Instead, he stayed quiet. Worried you reached for his hands that were lying on his blankets. Zenitsu flinched slightly, glancing up at you from beneath his bangs and you gave in to the urge to brush them out of his face before you could think about it any further. They were sticky with sweat.

He didn’t move, watching you out of big eyes when your fingers brushed over his forehead.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked softly and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

The boy’s lips started wobbling and new tears were collecting at the corner of his eyes. He looked far away for a second before he was able to snap out of it, pressing his lips together and shaking his head vehemently.

You nodded. “Can I comfort you?” The question surprised Zenitsu as he froze once again, his whole body going rigid at your words. He even stopped breathing for a second. You waited in patience, wondering why he looked so shellshocked by the question. He was staring at you with so much surprise it almost broke your heart.

“You want to comfort me?”

Did you say almost broke your heart? Well, this did the job. His tone was hopeful but his words were barely a whisper, as if he didn’t dare to hope, didn’t dare to believe you could want that.

You took that as a yes. How couldn’t you when he was staring at you with such longing and such fear? You scooted forward, hands leaving his so you could instead wrap them around his shoulder and pull the boy against you, one hand coming up to pat his hair, while the other rubbed his back. Zenitsu let you, body still a little tense, barely moving at all. You tightened your grip and felt him relax a little. Zenitsu’s fingers twitched against your side and then his arms wrapped around you.

“Y/n chan,” he whimpered quietly and the wetness against your neck where Zenitsu’s face was resting told you he had started crying again.

You hummed softly, not saying anything, just holding him for a while. He was warm and his face was hot against your skin, flushed with his distress. He sniffed every now and then but otherwise, he stayed quiet. You held him closer to you whenever another quiet sob racked his body, hoping that rubbing circles on his back was enough to calm him. You did that until he wasn’t shaking anymore and his whimpers and sniffling had died down a little.

“You’re amazing Y/n chan, you’re so kind and you smell good,” Zenitsu murmured against your neck and you rolled your eyes at his last statement.

You doubted you smelled good after spending your last few days in the deep woods hunting demons but Zenitsu was exhausted so you wouldn’t tease him about it this time.

“Thank you, Nitsu.”

“Your hugs are nice,” Zenitsu added, sinking further into you and your cheeks grew a little warmer at the compliment. You hummed, not knowing what to respond.

You leaned your head on top of his and let your hand run through his hair. Maybe that would distract him from saying more embarrassing things like that. Zenitsu sighed against you.

“How are you feeling?” You asked quietly.

“I-“ Zenitsu began, stuttering “It was a really, a really scary dream, I was so frightened.”

You nodded against his head, letting your fingers play with his hair. It was surprisingly soft, you noticed.

“It wasn’t real. Whatever it was it’s not real. We’re safe here, don’t worry,” you whispered, making soothing sounds, afraid he’d start crying again.

Your heart clenched when he tightened his grip around you and buried his face deeper into your neck. You could feel his warm breath on your skin and your heart reacted weirdly to it.

“I feel safer now,” he mumbled. Heat crawled up your neck and settled in your cheeks and you were glad Zenitsu was currently unable to see your face. This would have been hard to explain.

When you were certain Zenitsu’s breathing had calmed and that there were no more distressed sounds coming from him, you spoke up again.

“That’s good…are you ready to go back to sleep?” You asked, pulling back to catch his eyes. At your question he looked away from you, scrunching up his face.

“I don’t-“

“We had a long day and you need the rest,” you reminded him and he gave a reluctant nod.

“O-okay.”

He pulled back from you, withdrawing reluctantly from your embrace. His shoulders slumped and he slowly, really slowly, reached for his blanket, glancing at you from time to time. He looked like a kicked puppy and you already felt bad for having suggested you go to sleep. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to hold him for the rest of the night. No, he was warm and his hair smelled good, too. But that would be selfish, he needed the sleep. And so did you.

You could see the discomfort, recognised the expression on his face as he started wiggling under the blankets until he was settled. You waited until he stopped squirming around, then you stood up to go back to your side of the room.

Zenitsu looked after you, you felt his eyes bore into your skin and you could swear you could feel the sadness almost suffocate you. When you reached your futon, instead of sliding in and going back to sleep you started pulling, the futon and the blanket and pillow on top of it, towards Zenitsu’s side again. When you dropped the futon, barely a few inches away from where the boy lay, he stared at you with teary eyes.

“Y/n chan…”

“Don’t mention it.”

You crawled under the blanket, wiggling until you found a comfortable position. Then you turned your face to look at Zenitsu and the boy smiled, wobbly and full of emotions, but still happy. You smiled back, lifting the corner of your lips only a little bit to return the sentiment. Relaxing under his blanket, he buried his face a little deeper into his pillow.

The tiredness that still weighed down on you from your interrupted sleep, was slowly returning with more force now that Zenitsu had calmed down and was lying next to you. Catching sight of his bright eyes and his soft face so close to yours made your bones feel heavier and your fight against sleep cease.

You didn’t know when it had started, the comfort that came with being close to the boy, you really didn’t. But you couldn’t find it in yourself to dislike it. Not when he was still trying to look at you despite how his eyelids were fluttering shut every now and then. You could tell your presence calmed him, too. But there was still something holding him back from letting go.

You scooted a little closer, before pulling your arm from beneath the blanket and sprawling out your arm in between your and Zenitsu’s futon, palm facing upwards. Zenitsu was frowning a little as he watched your movement with scepticism, not quite understanding what you were doing.

He got the hint when you started twitching with your finger, wiggling them a little. His face lit up and he looked up at you with bashful hopefulness. The look in his eyes made you a little breathless.

Carefully he pulled his arm from beneath his blanket, reached out and carefully linked his fingers with his, glancing at you in case you changed your mind. When he didn’t seem to find any discomfort in your eyes, only tired but genuine kindness he relaxed and tightened his grip, holding your hand.

“Now go back to sleep, Nitsu,” you mumbled, voice slurring at the end.

“Thank you, Y/n chan.” His voice was soft and full of emotion and he squeezed your hand once more.

You hummed, waiting until the boy had closed his eyes and then until his breathing had evened out and his grip around your hand had loosened, too. Then and only when you waited a few minutes to make sure he wasn’t slipping into another nightmare, you allowed yourself to rest, too.

The rest of the night went by without any further interruptions. And you didn’t let each others hands go, holding onto each other throughout your dreamless sleep.

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